FUCK LIFE

Oh, today is such a crappy day. Being able to talk again gave me nothing but more time at the checkout counter. So everything is back to normal at work. And of course I hate it. The terrible weather is also bringing on depression. I don't want to be here. I know I don't have to. At least in about three months. But three months is a long time. But then again it isn't. it's just that I currently seem so unable to accomplish anything at all. I should be preparing for my journey, I should apply for scolarships, I should try to learn more french, I should take care of anything that is in my power to...change for the better. But I don't. I'm just sitting her, whining. Disturbing Emma in her studying just to...whine some more. I am so childish. And I know the best thing is to force onteself to actually do something. It will make you feel better. But I always think that I'm gonna make myself do it...soon, later. Tonight, tomorrow. Why does the present feel so unpleasant? In evvery way.

This blog was meant to be for entertaiment, for amusement not for self-disclosure. But so I have thought many times and I have never succeeded.

Today I have at least sold my gym card, which unexpectedly gave me 300 SEK. I should be very happy about that. I have also got an answer from the study counsellor at Komvux, and propably my application for got lost. Again. Gah, why can't things just...work out? Je n'y arrive pas du tout. I've promised myself that I'm in a moment shall call the customer service at LG to be told what to do with my laptop. A key came off, and the computer is still quite new!

Bah, maybe I should it some candies? Again. FML or what?

16:49

Ha ha ha ha!
Petter told me some weeks ago that I seem to be quite pushy in relations to other people..And I've realized that is so true! I just sent a message on facebook to a person who MIGHT be the woman I met at Ica (in her fifties or something!) to ask if it really is her!

But I swear! The message was really polite and even if it isn't her maybe I can start talking to the other one. Lol. I had never even went looking for her on facebook if I hadn't learnt the other day that really old people (like your parents or so) actually have facebook. That brings a while new dimension to things.

I've also been told at the age of 11 that you always have to make some effort, otherwise you don't get any friends and it is all your fault. You can't wait for other people to come to you because no one else will take initiative.

I will never forget that. It is like my mantra.
Finally I called the support and they will take in the laptop for reparation. I guess I have to be without it for about 10 days. Sucks a little but it's manageable. In fact we have like 5 more computers at home. So I guess I'll survive.